hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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