He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
