just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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