Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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