She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
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