I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Randomize
