Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
