Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
