idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
