He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
