What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
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