i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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