weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize