She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
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