i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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