He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Randomize
