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Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
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