I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I wish you could order shots online.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize