how hairy? two words: wookie tits
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize