So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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