Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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