maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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