This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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