when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
