Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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