Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize
