So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
