I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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