I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
