I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
