He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
