So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize