so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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