I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
