He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
