Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
