but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
You are the jesus of drinking
I would ride that face into the sunset
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize
