erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
