pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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