i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize