Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Randomize