I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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