I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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