new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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