I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
