he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
you never un-have a 4some
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
