I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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