I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Randomize
