it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I think I died a long time ago.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
