moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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