Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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